Tales From The Crypt: "...And All Through The House" 1972 vs 1989

If you're reading this blog, you know what I'm talking about when I say that the "...And All Through The House" segment of the classic Amicus anthology Tales From The Crypt flat out RULES!  In fact, it rules so much that Robert Zemeckis decided to remake it as the second episode of the classic television version of Tales From The Crypt.   So, since it's the holidays and all, I figured now is as good a time as any to look at both versions of this creepy classic tale.  Let's get into it shall we?


Of course, there will be spoilers here . . . so if you haven't seen either the 1972 film or the TV episode yet . . . turn away now!

Tales From The Crypt is a fine example of a British Horror anthology (of which, there was quite a boom in the early to mid-1970s, with Amicus releasing the best of the bunch).  It's got five separate stories, tied neatly together by an engaging wrap-around, all of which serve as the sort of morality tale the original source comics did in the 1950s. 




"I know he's got that insurance money on him somewhere!"

The first segment, of course, is "...And All Through The House" and it stars Joan Collins as a Joanne Clayton, a woman who kills her husband on Christmas Eve, with the hopes of finding a rich insurance settlement in her stocking!  As Joanne methodically arranges her victim so that it appears he had an accident, she fails to hear a radio announcement of an escaped mental patient dressed in a Santa Claus outfit in her area.  Of course, he comes straight to her house and she gets into a bit of a juggling act trying to arrange her late husband's corpse, barricade her home, and pull the St. Nick wool over the eyes of her daughter who is anxious to see the Jolly One and won't stay in bed.  Amicus mainstay Chloe Franks plays the daughter, Carol, who eventually lets "Santa" in at the story's climax. 

Joan Collins thinks it's Linda Evans outside her window!

Everything here is played for sheer terror and director Freddie Francis works hard to make the audience's blood freeze when the killer Santa first shows up.  Collins is exceptional at showing off her range of emotions with very little dialogue (she only really ever speaks to her daughter and once to her husband after she's killed him).  She goes from cold and calculated as she arranges the "accident" scene and cleans up the murder scene to fright once "Santa" reaches in through and open window.  All the while, she's trying to let on what happened to her husband even though Carol let's out a "goodnight Daddy" and her prying eyes are constantly on the verge of exposing Joanne's misdeed. 

Santa, wash your hands before taking a cookie please!

The gore is minimal here, though, as it was 1972.  However, the little bit of red stuff that we do see is effective and works well within the context of a "comic book film".  When Joanne first clobbers her husband over the head with the fireplace poker, there's a squirt of very pink blood on the newspaper he's reading.  There's also a messy -- again, very pink -- stain on the white shag carpet that the body collapses onto.  Honestly, it looks as though Collins spilled some pink nail polish onto her groovy carpet . . . but the color is so splashy that looks right at home in the context of a 1970s comic book!  Joanne also collects some of the spilled blood into a champagne glass to effectively dress the scene of the "accident" once she throws her husband's body down the basement stairs.  Although, as she cleans up her tools later on, the "blood" comes off a little too easily with some soap and water. 


All in all, this original version of "...And All Through The House" is the perfect kick-off to a great film where every story is a corker!  In fact, it also may very well be the first (?) [or at least first "modern" - ED.] "Killer Santa" film!  Everything is played pretty straight, though there is an underlying sense of dark humor in the segment's penultimate twist as young Carol finally lets "Santa" into the house with the same sort of naïve and giddy smile any child would have at seeing Saint Nick at their house! 

True be told, the television remake of "...And All Through The House" was actually the first Tales From The Crypt episode that I ever saw -- at least part of it!  I vividly remember my dad being excited about the premiere of Tales From The Crypt, recalling the old comics and there was even Mom chiming in about seeing the 1972 film back in the day as well!  Of course, the first episode was "The Man Who Was Death" with William Sadler taking the law into his own hands after he's laid off as the city jail's executioner; of course, being a good dad and shielding my then 6yr old eyes, my Daddy-O quickly changed the channel at the first sight of female nudity!  We, of course, came back to HBO a short time later, picking up with the "...And All Through The House" episode which, again, I recall Dad putting his foot down and changing it quickly deeming it to be "too scary" for my young eyes!


Alas, series show-runner Robert Zemeckis directed "...And All Through The House", which effectively retells the classic story as seen in the original 1972 film [and Vault of Horror #35 - ED.] though, as with most remakes, things are expanded a bit. 

Drinking too much can cause a splitting headache.

Zemeckis' then wife, the late Mary Ellen Trainor (Dr. Stephanie Woods in the Lethal Weapon films), stars as the wife, killing her second husband (played by the always awesome Marshall Bell), once again, for his insurance money.  Following the same set-up, there's an upstairs daughter who is supposed to be sleeping, whom the wife desperately tries to hide the evidence of the murder from.  Larry Drake also stars as the decidedly more gruesome Jolly Old homicidal maniac, caked with blood and gore in his beared and suit!  There are some subtle changes to the story here as well -- the wife tries to dispose of the body via an outside well, the story is expanded with a lot more action between the wife and "Santa" as he tries methodically tries to get into the house. 

What? No more Lethal Weapon movies?!

Zemeckis plays up the dark humor of the original story, really ramping up an almost cartoonish vibe as "Santa" becomes like Wile E. Coyote, always getting bonked on the head and mugging for the camera before falling out of frame, unconscious.  It's also worth noting that Marshall Bell is great at playing a stiff; he's always displaying a goofy death face -- even with a plastic bag on his head -- and expertly plays dead weight as Trainor drags him out of the house, through the snow and decides just how to dispose of him.  Another comedic moment comes when, after the "Santa" has first shown up, the wife decides to make it look like her husband was axed to death by the killer!  Even though she herself is a cold-blood killer, she still cannot bare to smash an axe into her late husband's head -- his dumb expression peering back her probably doesn't help!  So, she closes her eyes and blindly swings, completely missing him! 


Trainor herself is quite effective as well, as she again displays a range of emotions; going from cold-blooded murderer to a mom whose trying to hide her misdeed to a frightened mom trying to protect herself and her daughter.  Her blood-curdling screams at the story's close as, once again, "Santa" finds his way into the house, are pretty chilling too, if not a bit over the top.

'Dem cookies ya got there are bad for my teeth!

Drake really steals the show here though, as the homicidal maniac.  At the time, he was known for back to back Emmy wins as mentally-handicapped Benny on L.A. Law (his only previous foray into Horror as the similarly challenged Bubba Ritter in the CBS TV movie Dark Night of the Scarecrow some eight years earlier).  Drake is effectively menacing -- again, that nasty shit in his beard probably helps sell it -- without saying a single word until the very end when he utters a "Naughty...or nice?"  His comedic chops are also on display as he gets manhandled and beaten up like a Looney Tunes character, displaying a stunned expression and muttering something that sounds like a Gremlin, just short of seeing stars and tiny, cartoon birds circling his head. 


Ultimately, this episode perfectly sets the tone that the rest of the series would follow -- horror morality tales, soaked in dark humor.  It perfectly updates the (then) modern sensibilities of the story and expands a little to pad out the running time for a full episode.  All in all, not a bad piece!   


If you were to hold a gun to my head and ask me to choose which version of "...And All Through The House" was better, I'd probably go with 1972 because Joan Collins.  Although, my love for that particular telling may be mostly due to the nostalgia I feel for the first time I saw Tales From The Crypt from front to back; the same could be said for the Zemeckis version as well, with a similar nostalgia for the television series!  If you haven't seen either of them, do yourself a favor and make it happen -- Tales From The Crypt is available on Blu-ray from Scream Factory in its original, uncut form, paired in an awesome double feature with its 1973 sequel The Vault of Horror (presented in two different versions!) and, of course, HBO's awesome Tales From The Crypt series is available via Complete Season sets or multi-packs depending on your needs (you wants Season 1, of course, for "...And All Through The House").

Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)

Let's get this out of the way:  first and foremost, Silent Night, Deadly Night is not a very good film.  While I like it, it's definitely not one that I find myself running back to again and again for repeated viewings, as it usually only gets played during the Christmas season.  While I was too young to remember its theatrical release controversy, I can easily recall seeing its ominous "big box" video tape in video stores throughout my youth. 


That image is what sold me on the film.  It's just so iconic and states exactly what you're gonna get with a title like Silent Night, Deadly Night!   Here is a film that goes balls out to add its own twisted take on the Slasher Killing On A Holiday subgenre . . . and does so with the sort of glee and shock value one might expect from a classic grindhouse picture!

My original big box VHS copy of the film.

The plot is pretty simple:  as an 8yr old, after a twisted "Santa Claus punishes bad little boys and girls" warning from his dementia-fogged Grandpa, Billy watched his parents get brutally murdered by a gas station robber dressed in a Santa Claus suit.  Billy and his infant brother are sent to live in a local orphanage, where he continues to act out around Christmas time, having not really coped with what he saw that fateful night.  Billy's sense of reality continues to crack as he then witnesses two people making love and then is promptly caught by Mother Superior, who immediately punishes him for having witnessed such filth (and the couple for doing the deed).  At the age of 18, Billy has started working at a small toy store, where he quickly becomes a favorite good guy employee...until the Christmas season arrives and he's forced to fill in for the store's Santa.  From that point on, all hell breaks loose as Billy sets out on a yuletide murder spree.

Look, we don't watch Silent Night, Deadly Night for the smart decisions that its script doesn't make -- having someone traumatized by Santa Claus get a job at a toy store is bound for trouble around the holiday season!  We watch it (and love it!) for the over the top kills, carnage and distorted Christmas spirit that it conveys!  For someone with a slightly dark sense of humor, Silent Night, Deadly Night is a perfect fit when it comes to Christmas movies. 

Yes, that's Back To The Future's Mr. Peabody as Grandpa!

Acting-wise, Silent Night, Deadly Night was never going to win any awards, though Lilyan Chauvin is excellent as Mother Superior and character actor Britt Leach (Weird Science, The Great Outdoors) is effective as doomed toy store owner Ira Simms.  As a matter of fact, its star, Robert Brian Wilson, was initially said to be so ashamed of the film that he avoided talking about it for years after, only recently showing up at Horror conventions and eager to greet long time fans!  Genre favorite Linnea Quigley also shows up . . . to take her top off and quickly get impaled on a set of mounted antlers in one of the film's crazier kills!

Lilyan Chauvin as Mother Superior

Britt Leach as doomed toystore owner Ira Simms

What really helps sell a film like Silent Night, Deadly Night is its premise and the over the top kills that occur throughout its running time!  Also helping it along was the controversy surrounding its original -- and brief -- theatrical release from TriStar Pictures; the fury over it was so great, the film was pulled after two weeks, shelved, and eventually dumped on home video a year later, where its legend continued to grow.  Throughout the 80s and 90s, many kids like myself would frequent local video stores and see USA Home Video's big box cassette on shelves and react with a combined sense of fright, intrigue and awe.  It was almost a right of passage to see this film...though I ultimately cannot recall the first time I saw it myself. 

Robert Brian Wilson punishes the naughty as Billy

Speaking of over the top kills, this is probably the only movie where a cop guns down a deaf Santa Claus in front a bunch of kids!!  Come on man! 

Of course, the film was successful enough to spawn four sequels; the first of which, 1987's Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2, itself became an internet sensation with its hilarious "Garbage Day" murder sequence.  A loose remake even followed in 2012, but you're better off just sticking to the OG as it's pure grindhouse trash, perfect to keep you toasty by the fire on a cold December night.

Christmas Eve is the scariest damn night of the year!

Paulie Pennino: The Real Star of The Rocky series

40 years ago, Sylvester Stallone introduced the world to a true champion and American symbol in the character of Rocky Balboa when Rocky first hit theaters.  Over the next 39 years -- 5 sequels and a spin-off -- that character would continue to endure and connect with audiences around the world.  However, there is one character throughout the original six films whose presence holds much more weight than we all first thought...


Paulie, as played by the wonderful Burt Young.

Throughout the 30-year timespan of the original films, Paulie remains a powerful character, often steering the plotline and setting events into motion, making him perhaps almost more important than Rocky himself!  Let's take a look shall we?


Rocky (1976) - In an Academy Award-nominated Supporting Actor role, Burt Young introduces the world to Paulie, Rocky's best friend and future brother in-law in a stink hole of a bathroom tucked away inside a Philadelphia corner bar.  Almost immediately, Paulie's character is defined with a short fuse, proclaiming (numerous times) that "I'd like to kill the freakin' moron who broke the mirror" and that sometimes his sister Adrian gets him so mad "that I could split her head with a razor".  Charming, right?  But, since Rocky is good friends with him, there must be something loveable about him...


In perhaps the most important act of the entire Rocky franchise, Paulie essentially masterminds the first date between Rocky and Adrian!  Granted, he was a bit of a violent dick about it -- throwing the turkey that Adrian had in the oven out in the alley and pretty much forcing his younger sister out on the date -- but it's a significant moment that sets the tone for not only the rest of the film, but also the series as a whole.  Later on, Paulie even begins to resent both Rocky and Adrian for the relationship where he drunkenly confronts them, demanding...something.  It's not really clear what exactly Paulie demands here; respect? acknowledgement? credit? a good word with Gazzo?

In yet another tremendous move that solidifies their lifelong friendship, Paulie is the first true person to get in Rocky's corner (albeit for his own financial gain of course) once it's announced that he's been chosen to fight Apollo Creed for the Heavyweight title. This of course results in Rocky getting his infamously baggy boxing robe for the big fight (itself spawning a joke reference before Superfight II in Rocky II).  Later, after the fight, Paulie is instrumental in getting Adrian into the ring to reunite with Rocky, by causing a ruckus with a Philly police officer! 
Perhaps one of Rocky's most famous training techniques wouldn't even have been possible had it not been for Paulie:

Sure, Rocky "invented" punching the meat, but Paulie let him into Shamrock Meats to do so -- and did it again in Rocky Balboa!


Rocky II (1979) - A leaner (perhaps meaner?) Paulie has finally gotten out of his dead-end job at Shamrock Meats and now is collecting for mobster Tony Gazzo (obviously since Rocky is now legit and gone straight).  The entire time, it's Paulie who insists that Rocky should keep fighting, all the while he's trying to make a living off his winnings from the fight with Apollo and trying to parlay his career into TV commercials.


When Rocky's big break in commercials and his search for a cushy desk job don't pan out, who takes ownership of the Trans Am and picks up the payments Rocky can no longer make?  Paulie.  Of course, he also condones violence towards his little sister as well at this point with the hilariously sage advice of "Is my sister giving you a hard time?  If she is, ya break her teeth." 

When Adrian first pulls her defining character trait of "You should retire/My husband is retired" in this first sequel, seemingly forcing guilt at Rocky making him take up Paulie's old meat-packing position to make ends meet (only to get laid off anyway), it's Paulie who steps in to level things out.  Again, he does this by being a complete jackass to his pregnant sister, forcing her to fall into a coma after prematurely giving birth to Rocky Jr.  See?  Paulie is even responsible for Rocky Jr. being born!!


It's also worth noting here that Paulie seems to be off the sauce, as his leaner and healthier appearance indicates a man more keen on being a Wiseguy than a Budweiser Man.


Rocky III (1982) - Perhaps the sting of seeing Rocky's rise to the top after defeating Apollo and winning the Title in Rocky II -- events all spurned by Paulie's actions -- got the best of our lovable loudmouth.  He constantly sees Rocky getting all kinds of adoration and attention, while no crumbs are thrown his own way.  He turns back to the bottle and lands himself in the clink, forcing Rocky to come bail him out.


In this second sequel, Paulie's biggest contribution is that he's the one constant on Rocky's side.  Early on, he's now officially in Rocky's corner, working the charity fight against Thunderlips -- even showing a bit of courage by smashing a wooden chair over the giant wrestler's back and whipping out a switchblade (who carries a switchblade as a cornerman into a boxing match?!  Oh that's right...Paulie does!) to help cut off Rocky's gloves when the fight turns into a circus!  He even delivers some awesome, overlooked (especially in light of Mickey's many inspirational nuggets) words of wisdom in this scene:  "Rocko, remember the neighborhood!"  This quote seems to suggest the hardships that Rocky and Paulie came from growing up together, no doubt, rumbling and feuding with bums from the neighborhood, with Paulie whacking them out of course.  Now there's an interesting prequel idea:  a young Rocky and Paulie, brawling with neighborhood lowlifes in a bizarre combination of Bum Fights and Jean Claude Van-Damme's Lionheart!

Sqaushin' sterno bums since 1982.

Throughout the rest of the film, Paulie remains the one constant during the ups and downs that Rocky sees; when Mickey falls ill, it's Paulie who calls the doctor....when Mickey dies, Paulie is still there for Rocky.  When Rocky begrudgingly agrees to be trained by Apollo for a rematch with Clubber Lang, Paulie is the only one who still has faith in Rocky -- granted, "he's a bruiser, he ain't no boxer" isn't the most endearing endorsement, but it's better than the fear and uncertainty that's permeated from Adrian and Apollo.  Paulie knows Rocky can hit!  Besides, most importantly, during Rocky's training for the rematch, Paulie carries the boombox with the instrumental "jungle junk music" version of "Eye of the Tiger" . . . this is almost as important as Rocky himself during a training regiment!


Later in the Clubber Lang rematch, it's Paulie who knows exactly what Rocky is doing:  "He's not getting killed, he's getting mad!"


Paulie also acts as a "wonderful" babysitter for Rocky Jr. during the statue unveiling.  This is probably one of his funniest scenes as he hilariously finishes the story of Goldie Locks & The Three Bears:  "...busted for trespassing and 30 days in the cooler."


Rocky IV (1985) - At the height of the Cold War, Paulie represents the jingoistic sentiments many Americans felt at this time by sporting a Don't Tread On Me flag on the back of his coat when the team arrives in Russia, which Paulie quickly dismisses with "it don't look so tough."  He's also the first to stand up to Communism by mouthing off at Michael Pataki's Nicoli Koloff by pointing out the violent nature of the Russian government (keeping their people behind a wall with machine guns) and declaring that he's "the unsilent majority, bigmouth!"

Once again, Adrian delivers one of her famous "you can't win/don't do it" speeches . . . and Paulie is still there, encouraging Rocky to "blast this guy's teeth out."

Perhaps, in the film's most famous bit of advice, during Rocky's grueling fight with Drago, as he's starting to see "three of 'em out there", Paulie's wisdom shines through once again:  hit the one in the middle. 


Rocky V (1990) - It's safe to say that the entirety of Rocky V is Paulie's fault.  When meeting with Rocky's financial advisor after all of his assets are stolen by a crooked accountant, Adrian even exclaims "we are here because of you, Paulie!" 

"Fightin's the ticket Rocko!"

Once Rocky's fortune is gone, who was smart enough to keep the keys to his old place in the neighborhood?  Paulie, that's who!  With that, the entire family moves back into the split house that Paulie and Adrian lived in during Rocky.


When young upstart Tommy Gunn starts hanging around, who is immediately skeptical of him and his goals?  Paulie, once again.  Of course Robert (Rocky Jr.) and Adrian soon follow suit, but it was always Paulie right from the beginning who never liked Tommy and didn't trust him.  In fact, Paulie is also the first one to notice the "ship is sinking" when George Washington Duke gets involved and leers Tommy Gunn away from Rocky! 


As Rocky becomes more and more blinded by the shine of Tommy Gunn's wins under his management and training, Paulie is keenly aware of the scams and deceptions going on.  He can't watch his good friend fall down and become a victim to all of it . . . during the Christmas celebration as Rocky desperately tries to connect with the family and Robert in particular, Paulie immediately detects the young boy's unease and embarrassment in front of his friends and decides to drop the charade and continue drinking while watching Christmas Vacation!  Later on, when Tommy "The Machine" Gunn fights a seemingly rigged title fight under George Washing Duke, Paulie can barely stand to see his friend wallow in the brief glory he experiences by seeing his former protégé victorious.  It's Paulie's decision (at Adrian's behest) to go down to Andy's Bar and put their teeth around a few beers . . . after all, what are friends for right?


It's also here where Paulie becomes the main catalyst for the climatic streetfight between Rocky and Tommy, by standing up and declaring to the latter "Tommy, you're a piece of garbage, you know that?" before getting punched out himself!  Paulie getting punched out by Tommy is the spark that sets Rocky off to beat the shit out of Tommy once and for all! 


To top it all off, while Rocky's schedule is filled up with training Tommy Gunn throughout most of the film, who helps train Robert to whack out the local bullies at his new school?  Paulie (obviously the more technical training comes from Jimmy [Gambina]), but Uncle Paulie is there to help Robert focus on the tasks at hand and for encouragement! 

Rocky Balboa (2006) - Who introduces Rocky to the "cartoon fight" pitting current Heavyweight champion Mason "The Line" Dixon in a fantasy battle against a prime Rocky Balboa?  That's right...Paulie.  This ultimately awakens Rocky from his peaceful existence as a retired boxing legend/restaurant owner in the wake of Adrian's untimely passing. 


Who is a receptive ear, listening to Rocky as he discusses the "stuff in the basement", ultimately forcing our hero to come to terms with his own demons and questions of mortality?  Once again, it's Paulie.  Fittingly so, right before the actual fight (where Paulie is, once more, working Rocky's corner), Paulie urges his old friend to leave it behind after this. 

During Rocky's annual runs of "The Tour" of Memory Lane on the anniversary of Rocky and Adrian meeting, who's always right there by his good friend's side?  Paulie...always. 


Unfortunately, by the time 2015's Creed spinoff rolled around, Sylvester Stallone decided to retire the Paulie character, by having him buried right next to his sister Adrian, for Rocky to visit daily.

So there, you see, while some people might have said "drop that bum", Paulie turned out to be quite the catalyst for many of Rocky Balboa's greatest triumphs.  A true unsung hero of The Italian Stallion. 

ROCKY: 40 Years of The Eye Of The Tiger

The piece which you see before you probably isn't so much a review or a retrospective of the Rocky series.  In fact, it's more a document of how the Rocky series and character has touched my life through some of the toughest challenges I've ever faced. 


40 years ago today, a small film was released.  It was a film that no studio particularly wanted to make, least of all with its unknown, struggling screenwriter in the starring role.  It was a film that spoke to every single underdog who gave it their best shot.  It was a film that spoke to American spirit of never giving up, no matter how stacked the odds may seem.  It was a film that would go on to win three Academy Awards -- including Best Picture and Best Director.  It was a film that was spawn an enduring 40-year franchise and give birth to an indelible title character. 


Rocky.


I've always considered myself an underdog.  Perhaps that underdog spirit was ingrained in me at a young age, maybe even before I knew what it was.  The character of Rocky Balboa is the underdog for every person who's ever felt like a nobody, a loser, or like they just needed their one shot at their dreams.  Rocky Balboa is the voice for the voiceless who feel they deserve their "shot", but cannot find that voice within themselves.  Rocky Balboa is a heart of gold encased in a rough exterior; coarse edges with what is perhaps not the most eloquent delivery at times.  Rocky Balboa is the wrinkled, favorite t-shirt in a room full of neatly pressed dress shirts and ties. 

I am Rocky Balboa.


The first time I met Rocky Balboa, I was a mere 3yrs old.  My parents took me to see my first big-screen movie in a movie theater -- Rocky IV -- at the old Barn Theater in my hometown of Frenchtown, NJ.  Maybe it was the fact that the screen itself may as well have been 30 feet high or that my parents had hyped up the experience that I would be seeing "a really big TV" (but I had to be very quiet during the movie) . . . but I was instantly hooked.  Of course, sitting atop my parents piled-up coats, I wound up falling asleep.  Though my memory is fuzzy of that experience, I do remember key scenes from the film and, of course, that soundtrack!  Almost immediately after seeing Rocky IV, I remember my mom buying me the soundtrack on cassette -- something I played almost exclusively and literally wore out from so many plays!


From that point on, Rocky Balboa was a personal hero of mine -- along with Indiana Jones, Mr. T. and, later, Freddy Krueger.  I had the Rocky and Clubber Lang action figures from Rocky III, as well as some strange erasure-like rubber figures of Rocky and Drago from Rocky IV.  Whenever a Rocky movie was on TV, I'd watch; though at that young age, they all kinda blended into one film.  As I grew older, the Rocky films sort of got buried in my totem of fandom and, strangely, became a sort of embarrassment for me...to the point where I remember playing the Rocky IV soundtrack for a friend and lying to him that it was some sort of Christian Rock!


In 1990, I clearly remember seeing local news stories out of Philadelphia while Rocky V was filming and my dad clipping and saving newspaper articles for me about how Sylvester Stallone was going to kill off the character in a street-fight at the end of the film!  Philadelphia was pretty close to home and I begged and begged my parents to take me down their while they were filming, but it never happened.  Even when the film was released, for some odd reason, we didn't go see it in the theater!  Instead, I wound up catching most of it on Request Pay-Per-View (the first 10 or so minutes in perfect condition and the remainder of it through a scrambled signal like the Playboy channel!).  Again, not really sure why I didn't just rent the VHS when it came out! 


Again, Philadelphia wasn't too far from where I grew up and, as a kid, my parents would often take me into the city to visit the Franklin Institute or other various museums.  We'd almost always find ourselves driving by the Philadelphia Museum of Art at some point, but I never had the chance to get out and run up the stairs like my hero!


In 1996, the original Rocky celebrated its 20th anniversary and I recall a great deal of fanfare at the local Suncoast video as all five movies were re-released in a snazzy new VHS boxset.  I shrugged at such a release and moved on, ultimately feeling that maybe I'd outgrown the character. 


In the summer of 1999, I enrolled in a Video Production workshop class at the Art Institute of Philadelphia.  It was basically a week-long summer camp and we were housed in the Freshman dorms of Drexel University.  Early in that week, I'd heard that there was a free movie screening of Rocky actually ON the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art!  After some asking around, I managed to get approval to get some of us together and pile into a cab to head over to the screening!  Watching Rocky at that place, while sitting on those steps, surrounded by Philly locals was an absolute treat!  Naturally, the crowd exploded when Rocky actually runs up the steps.  Although the famous Rocky statue first introduced in Rocky III was no longer at the museum, there was a cool little plague with Stallone's Chuck Taylor footprints commemorating the film and character at the top of the steps! 


In 2000, I graduated high school and started at a local community college.  At the same time, I also started working a video store where I quickly re-acclimated myself with the Rocky series, as any one of them were my sort of "go-to" movies to put on while at work.  On 9/11/01, though I wasn't scheduled to work, I ended up coming in so that my boss could take some time off and reach out to his loved ones.  That night, I played Rocky IV on repeat as its sense of American pride and spirit spoke to me and brought comfort on that horrible day. 


By this point, I'd say I was pretty much a full-fledge Rocky fan once again and I didn't care who knew it.  By now, I'd manage to not only investigate, apply, get accepted to, and start classes at Rutgers University, but I was also the first in my family to do so.  I was determined to be the first to graduate from college and, not unlike a certain down-on-his-luck boxer from Philadelphia, it was all a million to one shot in my eyes. 


In 2005, Stallone announced the release of a mens' health book he had written called Sly Moves and that he was to embark on a book signing tour across the country.  Somehow, I'd heard that he would be in New York at Barnes & Nobel and I decided that I needed to be there.  After a train ride that seemed to take forever a short cab ride, I found myself walking towards the end of a line that never seemed to end, stretching across multiple city blocks.  "There's no way this is gonna happen," I thought to myself.  The entire afternoon, as I waited, there seemed to be a sense that NOT everyone would get in and get a book signed.  Of course, as soon as I got there, I grabbed up two copies of the book in the hopes that I'd get them signed.  Sure enough, once the signing started, the line started moving and continued at a brisk pace.  Before I knew it, there I was....inside the store and Stallone was mere feet away from me.  I couldn't believe it that right there was a man whom I'd looked up to for as long as I could remember.  [Just thinking about it while writing this is making me tear up actually - ED]  I could really use some of that Rocky spirit to push me through my remaining time at Rutgers towards graduation in 2006!  We were given the following instructions:  no personalized autographs and no photos with Stallone.  Fair enough.  Next thing I knew, a worker grabbed my books, opened them to their title pages, and placed them on the table that Stallone was signing at in front of me.  


My eyes were huge with amazement as the man sat there, not 5 feet from me, signing and looking up at the hundreds of fans in line.  My books were up and I immediately thought to myself "I have to take advantage of this moment...."


"Thanks Sly."  It just blurted out.  I don't even know how I managed to get those two words out.


He looked up after signing my books and looked right at me with his crooked smile of his.


"You're welcome."


Goosebumps.  [Then, and of course even now as I relive the memory 11 years later! - ED]


Throughout the series, Rocky had Apollo Creed, Clubber Lang, Ivan Drago, and Tommy Morrison.....I had Math.  Math has always been my greatest and toughest opponent, often pounding me into defeat and tears of frustration and heartbreak.  Throughout 2005, I worked my ass off trying to finish school and potentially graduate in December of that year, earlier than expected.  I literally did a bunch of classes in the Spring '05 semester, took some during the Summer semester, and then loaded up again in the Fall.  One of those classes that Fall was an uncredited Math course -- the second of which were required for my English Literature major.  The rest of my courses were a breeze; sitting in hours-long lectures?  Writing 20+ page papers?  I didn't bother me.  In fact, my grades in those courses were great as a matter of fact!  That Math class was all that was standing between me and "the title" of Graduation.  I'll never forget going into my Math final pretty much knowing that I was defeated...there was no way I could pass as my back was against the wall and the bell wasn't gonna save me this time.  I was done. 


Right before Christmas that year, I got my grades and, low and behold, I failed that Math class.  Surprisingly not by much...but I still failed and my fate was sealed in terms of an early graduation.  That day, I immediately signed up to retake the class during the Spring semester.  As I was reeling from the defeat, literally my life played out like the scenes following Mickey's death in Rocky III; I was mopey and needed some motivation.  As it turned out, Stallone was actually in Philadelphia filming Rocky Balboa, and so in January 2006, with a good buddy of mine, I set out to the city to see if maybe I could find the production and maybe catch a glimpse of my hero again.


Our first stop was the Sports Complex where the Rocky statute had been housed (when it wasn't in storage) after the filming of Rocky V.  As it turned out, the Philadelphia Museum of Art deemed the statue to be a mere movie prop, not fit to be on their property, so it had be moved to the more fitting Sports Complex near the Philadelphia Spectrum [RIP - ED].  It was a sight to behold as I suddenly found myself face to face with the Rocky statue!  To some, yes, it was a mere film prop symbolizing a franchise to (at least in the eyes of many) progressively went down in quality.  To me, though, it was a symbol of hope...a beacon of strength even...telling me that I could do this.  Shouting at me, as Mickey told Rocky in Rocky V "Get up, you son of a bitch!"

Soon after, we headed for the Philadelphia Museum of Art to see the steps.  Now, going into it, I'd see hundreds of people run up and do the "Rocky dance" tons of times.  I probably even did it myself the first time I went there in '99 (though it was probably a little more subdued as I was around people I didn't really know, ya know?).  This time though...all bets were off.  Aside from two fellow sight-seeing fans that we ran into early at the Spectrum, no one else was around.  I remember walking up with every ounce of baggage about my seemingly crushed dream on my shoulders....and then I darted up those steps with every ounce of energy I had in me.



This pic here sits at my desk at work, reminding me that I can beat any odds.

From the top of the steps, I stood exactly where Rocky Balboa did in both Rocky and Rocky II, throwing my arms up in victory and triumph while I surveyed the city in front of me.  It was truly an empowering and exhilarating feeling.  The spirit of Rocky was now in me and I was ready to give the fight of my life!
When classes started back up, I reacted to this final Math class in a way that I never had before; with no fear and no pain.  I made sure that I either sat in the first or second row directly in front of the teacher's desk.  I made sure that I asked at least one question about the previous night's assignment; ensuring a discussion and How To was done for at least one problem I may have been struggling with.  When it came time to do my homework each night, I did not just once...but at least two or three times in a row.  However many Math problems -- fractions, equations, word problems (my toughest opponent probably) or whatever the hell I was doing -- I'd do 'em all multiple times to ensure they were engrained in my brain!  For each test leading up to the Final, I received the best Math scores of my entire school life!  It was working.  I had the Eye of the Tiger!  In fact, just before going in to take my Final, I vividly remember cramming one last study session in one of the commissaries.  I was cranking the Rocky IV soundtrack through my iPod, psyching myself up to go in and give everything I had...one...last....time. 


I passed with a strong score, effectively acing the class this time!  And, in May of 2006, I became the first person in my family to graduate from college.  It's a moment that I'll never forget and a win that I will cherish forever.  Not only did I pass the class and graduate, I also made the Dean's List either my second to last or final semester; another feat which I believed to be an impossible goal!   Much like how all of the Rocky films end with a freeze-frame, capturing that film's absolute peek moment for the character....that is how I will remember my time at Rutgers University.


December of 2006 saw the release of Rocky Balboa, a film that many scoffed at the mere idea of.  Stallone himself met such opposition in getting the film made that it seemed as though he were facing an incredible opponent the likes of which Rocky himself had never seen before!  Left and right, people were telling Stallone "No" and "you can't do this" . . . much like I had experienced throughout my atypical journey to and through Rutgers as a matter of fact.  When I saw the film on its opening day, I remember getting choked up and sobbing as it's revealed that Adrian has passed away and Rocky had very little left aside from a restaurant named after his late wife and his old pal Paulie, who was still stuck in the same dead-end job he'd been in 30 years prior in the original film.  Seeing the character of Rocky break down and speak about "some stuff in the basement" and a "beast" inside of him that needed to get out....it was powerful stuff that I easily connected with on almost every level.  It was truly a remarkable film and a fitting cap to an inspirational film series. 


 In 2014, my youngest cousin got married in Philadelphia and my wife and I traveled back home to visit my family and attend the wedding.  The day before we headed home, we made a pilgrimage to several filming locations from the series in South Philly...namely, the area where Mighty Mick's gym, J & M Tropical Fish (Adrian's pet shop) and Andy's Bar from Rocky V exist.  We also hit Rocky's apartment (and street) which isn't actually too far from these locations.  Gotta admit, visiting these locations was incredibly awe-inspiring and just as moving as standing at the top of the "Rocky steps" in '06!


Yo, how ya doin' Mick?

J & M Tropical Fish...long since closed up.



This is pretty much the site of the street fight in Rocky V.

Of course, nearly a decade after Rocky Balboa, Stallone would once again revisit the Rocky character one last time (in fact, pretty much every single Rocky sequel was supposed to be "the last time") in a very different film called Creed.  Here, Rocky was more of a supporting character, finally at peace with his past and his fighting career effectively in his rear-view mirror.  He lives a somewhat lonely, quiet life outlined by daily routines of ordering/delivering food for his restaurant and visiting the cemetery where he visits the side-by-side graves of Adrian and her brother Paulie.  Into the mix though, comes Adonis Creed, the illegitimate son of Rocky's one time rival and best friend, the late Apollo Creed.  Rocky reluctantly agrees to train young Donnie, only to face his own toughest opponent yet:  Cancer. 


I'm not ashamed to admit it:  when Rocky first receives his Cancer diagnosis and refuses treatment (Adrian died of "woman Cancer" as Rocky calls it, despite going through various treatments herself), I was a blubbering mess.  I went into Creed essentially believing that Stallone would finally kill off the Rocky character, as his story had pretty much reached its apex.  I'd come to terms with that very real possibility, believing that I'd have to say goodbye someone -- although fictional -- who has been both inspirational and friend-like for my entire life.  [for those of you who haven't yet seen Creed, you didn't really think I was gonna spoil the ending did you? - ED]


Today, when I watch a Rocky movie or listen to any soundtrack from the series, it's ON as far as I'm concerned.  I get hyped up to take on whatever challenge is in front of me.  I'm inspired to kick as much ass as I can and give my entire heart to whatever task is ahead.  Or, I just feel like fighting people!  Hey, Eddie Murphy wasn't lying about what happens when we see Rocky!


So, it is with this . . . me spilling my Rocky story, that I say a heartfelt THANK YOU to Sylvester Stallone for not just writing a screenplay and creating a character.  With the original Rocky (and its sequels), Stallone birthed a symbol for hopes, dreams, and success.  Rocky Balboa has always been and continues to be an inspiration to me.

Horror Movie Trailers: My Top 10 (for today anyway)

Ever since I can remember first going to the movies, the Coming Attractions (or previews/prevues, trailers, etc) have always been one of the excited aspects of going to the movies.  As a kid, I obviously didn't read too much about upcoming movies or know what was in the pipeline, aside from the odd heads up my Dad would throw my way after he'd heard it on the news or read in the paper.  There was something magical and surprising about seeing a coming attraction to a film that likely wasn't even in my vernacular before that very moment.


These days, trailers are still exciting, although the fun is taken away a bit now that we have trailer premieres on youtube well before actually seeing it played in a theater.  Also, it goes without saying that a lot of trailers are pretty redundant these days and, truthfully, in the last 17 or so years that I've been actively going to the movies on my own, there are some trailers that I've gotten incredibly tired of seeing again and again and again (fatigue from going to the movies too much maybe? - Ed.). 


Perhaps the argument for what makes a good trailer versus a bad one is something for another Constriction Pictures piece some other day though.  Instead, I'd like to share some of my favorite trailers and talk about what makes them so...


1.) Dawn of the Dead (1978)





What makes this trailer awesome?  Well, first and foremost, it's for my all-time favorite movie (obviously) -- but it's also a damn good trailer!  From the start, you've got Adolph Caesar's incredible, dread-soaked narration.  His voice, along with Percy Rodriguez (more on him later), was probably one of the most recognized in Horror trailer history.  On top of that, this trailer shows excited sequences from the film (spoilers though) without simply showing seemingly entire scenes.  It's got great graphics (more on that later) with that famous logo popping up several times.  All in all, it's just a solid, applause-worthy Horror trailer!  There's also a shorter version that utilizes an animated intro showing the film's poster artwork come to life!


2.) The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1973)





Here is the original release trailer for Tobe Hooper's classic; the New Line Cinema re-release trailer is cool, too, but this one just has a certain flare to it, making it feel 100% drive-in.  Again, cool narration throughout and awesome use of a logo.  It's also presenting a montage of sorts, showing off some exciting/terrifying moments without giving too much away. 


3.) Friday the 13th (1980)





This one is a good'un!  Featuring narration from "that trailer guy" Don LaFontane, the trailer for Friday the 13th terrorizes its audience with its seemingly never-ending body count of "1...2...3..." throughout its run time.  Granted, there's a bit of a fibbing and editing trickery in this trailer to make that body count inch closer to 13, but who's keeping score right?  If this was the first time I'd had any contact with the Friday the 13th series, I'd be terrified -- just by that counting!  Hell, it must have worked, as it literally continued with the trailer for Friday the 13th Part II the following year and the count restarted with the trailer for Friday the 13th Part 3D as well.


4.) Jaws (1975)





Another true classic!  While this theatrical trailer for Jaws is a little on the longer end of things (there were some great, shorter teasers as well), it still gets the job done and manages to excite the audience and hype the film!  Here, narration is handled by another famous Horror/Sci-Fi voice:  Percy Rodriguez.  The voice-over work from Rodriguez here perfectly depicts the terror of being stalked and attacked by a Great White Shark.  The clips herein are great, too, perfectly setting up the basic plot and, again, showcasing some of the action on hand.


5.) Alien (1979)





Here's a great trailer working together with the film's one-sheet to create a true sense of dread!  Using no dialogue or narration, the trailer for Alien takes viewers on a journey to the planet of LV-426 before smashing their sense with a quick, terrifying montage of clips as the volume gradually increases.  As much as it's effective in the film, the siren sound effect really sells Alien, not unlike the flashbulb pop effect in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre trailer!


6.) The Howling (1981)





Ahh, time for a red-band trailer!  You ever notice how there's that green screen with all the writing stating "The following PREVIEW has been approved for..." before almost every trailer?  There's a reason it's usually green, in that it was intended to be shown for "All" audiences (where appropriate...theater owners obviously wouldn't show the trailer for The Terminator before a screening of Toy Story).  In this case, the red-band trailer for The Howling was approved for "Restricted" audiences -- ie: people who were already paying to a see an R-rated film -- Horror or otherwise.  While tame by today's standards, this red-band trailer for The Howling shows some of the film's more intense sequences, along with some cool poster-style animated slashes throughout.  For what it's worth, there are also black-band and yellow-band trailers (the latter specifically for internet-only, though these seem to have been abandoned) as well! 


7.) Scanners (1981)





Here's another red band trailer for you . . . and this is also a perfect example of showing what is essentially just a scene from the film.  Of course, in the case of Scanners, this isn't just any old scene from the film; we've got one of the film's bonafide, jaw on the floor sequences!  If you were a Horror/Sci-Fi fan when this trailer first hit, I cannot imagine you not dying to see Scanners!


8.) Silent Scream (1979)





Here's a trailer for a film which had a reputation preceding it long before I ever actually saw it.  See, when my parents were dating, they often went to the movies and, most times, they saw Horror movies; so I can thank the likes of Dawn of the Dead, Friday the 13th, and Silent Scream for my existence!  Mom always told me about this movie: "it had a woman hiding in the attic and she'd come down and kill people" and then, how immediately after seeing it on a date with Dad, how she had to run and check the attic . . . which the door/stairs to, of course, happened to be directly across from my bedroom! 




9.) Curse of Frankenstein (1957)





First things first:  Peter Cushing rules.  When you have a film starring him and Christopher Lee, you've got cinematic gold as far as I'm concerned.  Hammer trailers were always awesome, but I had to go with this one since it was the first Horror trailer they did; and it's amazing from top to bottom!  You've got the ominous narration and some exciting copy throughout!  It sets up the story of Curse of Frankenstein quite well, while managing to showcase some of the film's grisly moments as well.  Again, just another exciting trailer that represents the Silver Age of Horror films perfectly. 


10.) An American Werewolf In London (1981)





Some of the best trailers and teasers don't even feature any footage from the actual movies themselves!  Along with the teaser for Leatherface:  Texas Chainsaw Massacre III (which I've written about numerous times), this teaser for An American Werewolf In London expertly uses newly shot footage to entice audiences to come check out the feature.  In fact, this is probably one of the most basic examples because it doesn't even feature anything really spectacular...just a trail of blood leading to a puddle and then a large werewolf paw stomping into it.  Simple and effective folks...maybe if some of the people who cut trailers these days paid attention, I'd be including some modern trailers in this piece! 


Speaking of modern trailers . . . I honestly cannot say that any have had the same sort of effect on me as the ones in this list.  Except for possibly the recent Star Wars and Creed trailers and teasers -- which, no doubt, got me excited as all hell, but were mostly exciting just to finally be seeing some footage from the films themselves -- I think most of these new only serve to generate clicks and hits on youtube.  The superhero trailers -- especially Marvel -- are all basically the same:  scenes of senseless destruction that would otherwise set an entire civilization back 20 or 30yrs, a CGI-looking suit and CGI stunts for said suit, the required "superhero landing" shot, that RWWWWAAAAAWWRR sound effect made popular in the Inception trailer, and possibly a catchy pop song (if it hasn't been covered by someone singing like they have a speech impediment, it's likely just a horribly butchered remix) and last minute funny, quotable quip before the credits shot. 


For modern Horror trailers, there's also a simple formula that, quite honestly, doesn't make the films look at that appealing.  My #1 pet peeve with modern Horror trailers is how any shots featuring any sort of blood in them are recolored so that the blood either appears to be chocolate or dirt.  What the hell is that?!?!  If the MPAA is gonna require studios to color tint any potential shots of blood, what's the sense of using that footage in the trailer anyway?!  Another peeve extends to the posters as well; using a shitty, generic-looking font for the logo.  All. The.  Time.  Even remakes of classics that had, ya know, memorable logos (three of the worst offenders that didn't even try to live up to their originals are Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, and Dawn of the Dead) usually opt for some neutral logo that appears to have been slapped together at the last minute!  It's insulting.  Again, there's also a reliance to use some old pop song in these trailers at times -- oddly sung/arranged cover or remix or even the original version -- because it's "creepy".   Seriously, I'm surprised no one has made a werewolf movie using Duran Duran's "Hungry Like The Wolf" in this fashion! 


Also, fans are still able to enjoy classic trailers through various compilations such as the 42nd Street Forever series from Synapse and Garagehouse Pictures' excellent Trailer Trauma and Trailer Trauma 2:  Drive-In Monsterama discs.  Of course, there are a number of excellent trailer collections on DVD, Blu-ray, and even VHS from all over the world, focusing on all genres!  One of my hobbies includes making my own trailer compilation DVDs digging through my collection that I've amassed from various special features in my DVD and VHS collections.  Making a trailer compilation is like making a good mix tape or a good setlist -- there is a particular flow to the proceedings! 


Until next time....please enjoy these Prevues of Coming Attractions!