Terror Train (1980)

After the one-two punch of Halloween and The Fog in 1978 and 1979, respectively, Jamie Lee Curtis was well on her way to claiming the title of "Scream Queen". With 1980's Terror Train, she officially embraced that title.

Terror Train has all the basic elements of a really good slasher movie...

-a cruel prank that went terribly wrong
-isolated location (in this case, a train)
-list of disposable teens with little character development
-killer with a cool mask/costume (more on this later)
-cool kills

Plot-wise, Terror Train has a pretty simple (and unique) setup. A year earlier, some freshman frat brothers and their girlfriends orchestrated a prank that took a very cruel turn for a young pledge named Kenny Hampson. Now, as seniors, the same fraternity is throwing a New Years Eve costume party, their "last big college party" (what are they gonna do for the rest of the school year? Must be a pretty lame fraternity, eh?) on a train. Faster than you can say "All aboard!" someone begins picking off people one-by-one and it doesn't take very long for Jamie Lee to figure out who it is.










Released during the first wave of Halloween knock-offs, Terror Train is easily one of the best of the bunch, sitting pretty closely with My Bloody Valentine in my eyes. One of the picture's most unique attributes is the setting: trains themselves can be kinda creepy, what with those narrow hallways and basically nowhere to go, right? Add to that a night time landscape set in the dead of winter and there's a recipe for goose bumps.

The train itself is a pretty ominous being, if not a character itself. That first opening shot during the credit sequence with the door of the train house slowly rising before the train starts plodding from within the smoky/foggy white light completely sets up the mood of the film. The train's whistle is also effective, as it sounds eerily like a co-ed screaming for her life.

One of the great strengths about slasher movies from the 70s and 80s is how much of their casts were complete unknowns. Any horror fan will tell you how distracting it can be with a cast populated by familiar faces (which is always one of the main complaints against modern horror). Aside from Jamie Lee Curtis, Hart Bochner (of Die Hard) and screen veteran Ben Johnson, the cast is mostly Canadian actors, all unknown to US audiences. Oh, and there's also a young David Copperfield as the "is he the killer or isn't he" Strangely Antisocial Magician character.

Speaking of Copperfield, a sizable portion of the movie is devoted to his magic routine and several tricks that he performs. I wish one day we'd get a commentary track from director Roger Spottiswoode, which could maybe shed some light on this part of the film. Was Copperfield, at the time pretty much an unknown illusionist, fairly strict on what could or couldn't be shown of his tricks and how they were to be filmed? Or were his tricks merely special effects? While he certainly wouldn't be winning any awards for his acting (he's obviously just playing David Copperfield here), he does pull off a convincing sense of suspicion whenever he's on-screen.

Jamie Lee Curtis is in fine form here as Alana, the girlfriend of one of the ringleaders of the prank their group wishes to forget. Unlike the rest of them though (either those directly responsible or those who merely follow), Alana feels bad about what happened -- as well as her role in it -- to Kenny. Aside from all of that, she's graduating early, which is essentially Creative Writing 101 stating that Alana is a smart cookie. Jamie Lee As Scream Queen always personified what the "Final Girl" character should be. She's smart, strong, and doesn't really take shit from anyone, including Doc, the self-appointed fraternity leader and the one with all the good ideas.










Doc, as played by Bochner, is a character cut from the same cloth as Keir Dullea's Peter in Black Christmas. He's moody, arrogant, conceited, and basically thinks his shit don't stink. He's also pretty much a tool, leaving the viewer wondering why anyone in their right mind would follow this guy's direction, let alone be his friend. Doc is the archetype of the boyfriend/jock who fends for himself and would probably use his girlfriend as a human shield in the face of the killer. His girlfriend is Alana's best friend, Mitchy, and well...there's some strange swinger vibe between them as they both ditch their significant other for an attempted romp with someone else's lover.

Another odd character is Alana's boyfriend, Mo (played by Timothy Webber, surely a long-lost brother to Sam Raimi). While he probably has the best intentions, he always winds up disappointing Alana and falling prey to Doc's juvenile pranks and jokes. On top of that, he blindly follows Doc in wandering off with a drunk co-ed behind Alana's back. WTF, mate?

Anyway, the coolest thing about Terror Train is the killer, Kenny Hampson. Since everyone is wearing costumes on the train, Kenny is able to change disguises as he racks up his body count. He's even able to make a Groucho Marx mask creepy as all hell! But, easily taking the crown for creepiest mask is that of an old man. Looking like a cross between a troll and a hairless version of Fluffy from Creepshow, the Old Man mask stands neck and neck with the Groucho mask as being the most effective and scary of Kenny's disguises.










Even with his face covered by a mask, Kenny's eyes stare daggers into his victims, potential or absolute.

In the end, Terror Train somehow slipped through the cracks in the wake of the mainstream popularity of the Friday the 13th and Halloween franchises. The VHS was long out of print for years (I initially had to resort to a fullscreen R2 Spanish import disc with a print that looked as though it'd had been buried in a coal mine) until 20th Century Fox finally decided to put it out on disc in 2004. I'm convinced big studios take so long to release classic horror titles on DVD because they're anxiously putting every single waking minute of creativity into creating a brand-new cover because the original poster/video art that convinced many a viewer to check it out in the first place completely sucks (end of sarcasm). The print looks good and, while it's essentially a barebones release (aside from the dirty, old fullscreen version on the flipside), it does contain the original theatrical trailer!

Anyway, yeah . . . definitely see Terror Train. It's crucial viewing for any self-respecting slasher fan. See it!